This past weekend was not a banner weekend for me.
First, I had a list of goals and did not accomplish all of them. But keeping with the theme and title of this blog, let’s start with the positive. I completed my necessary lesson planning, which I guess was the most important thing, and I made my weekly venture to the supermarket. I also was able to buy more respirators…What are things I never thought I’d be saying when I started this experience for $1000, Alex? Mr. Trebek, not Ken Jennings, not Mike Richards, not Katie Couric, and CERTAINLY not Dr. Oz, will always be the end of that sentence for me. And unlike Oral Roberts, I was able to make a buzzer beater by doing my laundry on Sunday night.
(Side note: Someone please tell me how Abmas–#3 on Oral Roberts–is pronounced “Ace-Miss?” It’s a crime to the English language.)
Now, to the not-so-good. I’d been intending on cleaning my flat, and that didn’t get done. I procrastinated yet again. Totally my fault. At least my roommate did some cleaning. But I missed the boat. I also wanted to take some time and begin the Czech government’s preposterous census. That didn’t get done, either. By the way, I have a major bone to pick on this one. I don’t even talk to my roommates that much, and now I basically have to know their mother’s maiden names and what they ate for breakfast this morning? In general, a census is a good thing, but some of these questions are just plain silly. It’s just another unnecessary stressor at a time I certainly don’t need those.
A few people have told me that I’m good at this writing thing. Much appreciated. Taking their advice, I’m considering starting some additional writing on the side or even finding a part-time writing job to supplement my teaching. I wanted to get the ball rolling on that this weekend, too. However, just like Syracuse on Saturday night, I couldn’t get that ball into the net. Ugh.
If there were a tournament about making and keeping friends, I’d probably be right about where the Orange were–an #11 seed. Maybe that’s even too generous. Anyhow, I don’t have a ton of friends here, and it’s not something I’m proud of. It’s something I’m working to get better at, although the Coronavirus restrictions are not making it easy. But I do have a handful of folks I can ask to hang out every so often. I reached out to several people to do something this weekend. Every single one of them said no. Yes, I went the entire weekend without any social interaction. Uh, guys, I might have social anxiety, but I don’t bite. I promise.
I did have two very nice nature walks, albeit solo ones. But as a human who craves social interaction, I only wish that I could have shared it with someone. Not having anyone to hang out with makes me feel like I failed as a friend and as a person. That was the path my mind wandered down this weekend. Yes, I know that this is probably not the case and that the other people were just busy, but you see, social anxiety is really good at telling lies and making them sound so true.
On Saturday night, I did another thing that I was not happy about. Stressed out over the way the weekend and life in general were going, I ordered McDonald’s and just pigged out. Big Mac, large fries, a soda, and a McFlurry for good measure. Sometimes, you just feel so badly that you need comfort food. That was me. I feel like I’ve been doing a good job when it comes to eating healthier and taking care of my body and mind lately, so yeah, I let myself down and have no one to blame but myself.
So to recap, we had some unaccomplished goals, rejection, and stress eating. Not the best combination.
As Sunday evening approached, I wasn’t in the best of moods. My weekend felt like a total waste. The self-doubt and self-talk arrived in droves.
But then, I realized something.
Sitting here feeling sorry for myself isn’t going to accomplish anything. In order to get out of this rut, my mindset needs to change. I need to think positive, regardless of how things are going. The things that occurred this weekend were merely setbacks. Everyone has setbacks (except for the first-place team in my fantasy hockey league). I might have lost this battle, but I can still win the war.
The first thing I can do to plant my flag is work tirelessly to be better. I need to be a better flatmate by doing my share. It will make my roommates happier and maybe make them be willing to work with me so that we can get this census, whether we agree with it or not, done. Second, I have to be a better friend so that others will want to hang out with me and enjoy the time we have together. Most of all, I need to commit myself to being goal oriented. If I don’t like the way a certain aspect of my life is going, only I have the power to change it. A writing opportunity or a new flat isn’t going to fall on top of me. I need to make that happen. If I can embrace a positive, goal-driven mindset, I’ll be the better human being that I always strive to be.
I also recognized that while some things in my life are not 100 percent ideal, I’m still better off than a lot of other people. I have a job. I have a place to live. I have good health. I have clothes on my back. God willing, I’ll continue to have these things. So what if I cheated and ate McDonald’s? There are kids in Ethiopia and Yemen who would kill to have that food on their table. It’s all about perspective.
At the end of the day, what can we do to see the positives in bad situations? The best thing is just finding a way to spin it into a positive. Positive affirmations work well for this. After all, I’ve been in Prague for nearly two years now, and although it hasn’t been easy, I’ve made it work despite the pandemic and restrictions. Whenever I have a bad day or bad weekend, I think about what I went through to get here and that I got out of my comfort zone in the first place.
I think another key is sharing your feelings with others. I’m blessed to have a supportive family who is always willing to listen to my problems and concerns. Yes, they are 5,000 miles and six time zones away, and sometimes they are the only people who I feel truly have my back, but I know that they ALWAYS will. Getting thoughts on paper through journaling is another excellent way to do this. I love to write (duh) and have written journal entries of up to five pages. I’m weird. Tell me something I don’t know. But it is very therapeutic. You should try it.
Clearing your mind is also crucial. Of course, you can do this by talking to trusted allies, but you also can meditate. Admittedly, I had never really meditated until recently, but I can already see the effects it’s had on me and how it changes my day for the better. You can watch motivational videos (I personally recommend TED Talks). The aforementioned nature walks are great because they can take your mind off of your concerns and keep you from constantly checking your phone. Hopefully, I’ll have someone to join me next time, but even if I don’t, it’s all good. Whether you have company or not, the walks still serve a purpose.
Another thing that helps to clear my mind is praying. God has helped me through some times in my life which have been much, much worse than this weekend. Being open and honest with God takes a big weight off of my shoulders. I know that He is there for me and knows my thoughts. He has a plan for me and wants me to come out of this experience stronger.
Ultimately, life just boils down to being the best version of yourself day in and day out. There have been days when I have been the best version of myself, and, of course, there have been days when I haven’t. But if you have a clear and open mind, a positive attitude, and the proper mindset, you’re more than halfway there. Don’t let one slip up or one tough weekend let you lose sight of your goals.
Because if you lose sight of your goals, then you’re just the Buffalo Sabres, and let’s be honest, no one wants to be them.
Czeching Out the World of TEFL 