This past week has been one of the fastest, fiercest, most demanding rollercoasters I’ve been on in quite a long time. If there are mistakes in this blog, I apologize, because simply put, my brain is mush.
We’ve had a lot of good: Exciting job prospects for next year, high-quality lessons with a number of positive reviews from students/employers, and catching up with friends I hadn’t seen in a while. There’s also been a lot of not-so-good: Bad news regarding my U.S. tax situation, several new and unexpected things being put on my plate when I already have so much to deal with, and being left out of other friend gatherings. (Dear social anxiety, you suck. Love, Mike.)
With my mood (and my blood pressure) swinging so much from day to day, I thought this would be the perfect time to let you all in on a little secret. In fact, this secret has been a big reason why I’ve been able to get through such a ridiculous week.
I meditate.
I know it’s not necessarily a common thing for males to do, but I do it.
My friend introduced it to me a few months ago, and at first, I wasn’t sold. Similar to how I’ve never believed (and still don’t believe, maybe one day) in astronomy, I just couldn’t get into it. I tried and would usually be pretty consistent for a few days, but I noticed that it wasn’t doing anything for me. I would either not have time, not wake up early enough in the morning (when the sun comes up at 8 a.m. in January, who could blame you?), or get headaches. For a while, I gave up on it. Because I’m extremely Type A, I knew that even if I did it, I’d be stressed either way.
After a while, however, I realized that those were just excuses. We’ll never become anything close to the best versions of ourselves if we make excuses. So I did some research on meditation, talked to my friend about the benefits it had in her life, and decided to give it that second chance it so richly deserved.
And boy am I glad I did.
I now have a morning routine that I can count on. Wake up, meditate for 10-15 minutes, and pray. All before the first lesson of the day. If the weather cooperates (are any other Prague people really getting tired of the constant rain and cold?), I crack open my window to let in the fresh air of a fresh day. I know that many people like to meditate in the evening, but I do it in the morning because I just think it’s a great way to get your mind cleared and focused going into a new day and a clean slate.
Meditation has helped me feel better and more organized. I’ve been laughing more and having more fun. I’ve been making smarter decisions. I’ve had more energy and believe the quality of my work has been better. Since my mind has been clear, I’ve been more willing to let things go. On the few days I haven’t done it, there’s been a stark difference. I’ve been more stressed, more rushed, more sluggish, less patient with myself and others, more likely to catastrophize, and taken things a lot more seriously.
Like I said before, meditation does not and cannot change the fact that I am very Type A. Anxiety is still going to have days when it wins. We definitely had some of those days this past week. But with a clear conscience and an open mind, you can be in a better position to handle those days.
A clear conscience helps you become a better person. My goal each and every day is to be a better son, brother, uncle, teacher, and friend than I was the day before. If I’m not doing that, then why am I here? Meditation leads to self-improvement, which leads to so many new doors being opened on a personal, professional, and social level. If you’ve read this blog before, you know how passionate I am about bettering myself. Maybe I’m too passionate about it. But there certainly are worse things to be too passionate about…
In order to truly better yourself, you not only need that clear conscience, but you need to reexamine your thoughts and decide if these thoughts will lead to success for you. That being said, I close with a powerful quote that I saw on Facebook the other day…
“The goal of meditation isn’t to control your thoughts, it’s to stop letting them control you.”
As someone who has struggled with this his whole life, I will say that meditation has helped me do a better job of blocking out negative thoughts or turning them into positive ones. I still have a long way to go with this, but I know that if I continue meditating, I get there.
I need to get there. Otherwise, I’ll just continue to be sucked in by the rollercoaster that is life.
And I don’t like rollercoasters.
Czeching Out the World of TEFL 