Bye bye, social media?

by mikebev25
Not spending time on social media allowed me to enjoy the little things in life, like this beautiful lake. Yes, believe it or not, this is in Prague.

I did it again.

Did what again, you might ask?

Well, I decided to log off of social media.

But not forever–just a break.

I know what you’re thinking. “Mike, are we really gonna get a blog every time you take a break from social media?”

Well, no, that would be boring.

So why am I writing about this one?

It’s because I’m even prouder of this one than the first. I write about things that I’m proud about. If you don’t like it, don’t read it.

For those who may be new to this page, let’s rewind to February. It was much…err, a little colder, there were many more coronavirus cases, we were only on our third health minister of the crisis (right now, we’re on #5, although it’s really just #1 back again), and the Israelis and Palestinians were getting along a lot better than they are right now. For two weeks, I logged off of all social media, only to take a brief break to post about my beloved Tampa Bay Buccaneers winning the Super Bowl.

It did me some good, such as giving me time to start a workout routine and eat healthier. It also helped me on a professional level, providing me more time to plan engaging lessons for my students. It also gave me a chance to reflect about my situation and where I wanted to go next.

Last time, however, I didn’t do a good enough job of using the break to focus on the mental aspect.

So that’s why I did it again.

Over the past few weeks, I haven’t been in the greatest place mental health-wise. My mind has just been littered with concerns. Will the COVID numbers go back up now that everything is reopening? When can I get vaccinated and what things won’t I be able to do since I’m not vaccinated yet? Can I go back to New York this summer? What should I do about a job for next school year, and once I found one, what do I have to do to get up and running? Will I be able to stay in touch with the (sadly) too many friends of mine who are leaving or have left Prague? What about the current relationships in my life? Am I being a good enough son, friend, and teacher?

As my head completely spun, I realized that I had neglected my mental health for too long. It was also starting to have adverse effects on my physical health, professional career, and social life. I wasn’t being the best version of myself and others were quick to take notice.

Social media was only making matters worse. After the first siesta ended, I recognized that I was going right back to the old habits: checking it God knows how many times a day, overposting, being too personal or too negative with what I was posting, comparing my life to the lives of others, fearing that I was being left out of stuff, etc.

It was beyond time to break these habits. My life depended on it. Maybe that’s a small exaggeration, but social media certainly wasn’t helping with my high blood pressure.

Anyhow, this break was not going to be as long as the first. Maybe four or five days at most (EDIT: I did a break of four days, went back to it for two, and then decided I liked the break so much that I took two more days off from it). The two main things I wanted to do would be to get my mental health back in the right place and find ways to make social media better and more useful for myself once I did log back in.

I have to say that the break felt like a vacation. It was nice not to have to worry about someone living a better life than me. That might have happened while I was away, but I hearken back to one of my favorite quotes: “What I don’t know can’t hurt me.” Instead of logging into social media countless times in between lessons and at night, I spent that time on productive tasks, like getting ahead on lesson planning and tests, finding a new therapist, making arrangements to see my new school’s doctor for the initial health assessment, cleaning, changing up my meditation routine, going back to setting weekly goals for myself, and doing some research on self-improvement.

All of those things were great, but we’re missing the most important thing of all. Something I didn’t even think about the first time I took a break…

Being off of social media allowed me to sit back and enjoy the little things in life.

For example, I could take a picture of a beautiful sunny day in Prague and just enjoy the picture for its own natural beauty, rather than immediately thinking about where I would post it or what caption and filter I would use. Life is so much more than who views your stories. Don’t worry about that Instagram story; instead, focus on writing your own LIFE story so that you can inspire others and make society a better place for future generations.

While I wasn’t on social media, I had some extra time to watch YouTube videos and found a series of clips about a few guys who took a road trip from Denmark to China a number of years ago. They had an old, beaten-down car, little money, and constant bureaucracy headaches. One of the guys actually had to cut short his trip due to illness. They didn’t actually make it to Chinese soil. But they still taught me a number of powerful lessons in perseverance, adaptability (they had to change their route several times because of visa and police issues), and the ability to set ambitious goals for yourself. I will never forget these things, and had I not had the time to watch these seemingly trivial videos, I may not have been reminded of them and might have endured the same rut that I had been in for a few weeks. Sometimes, all you need is a fresh perspective, even when it’s from people you don’t even know.

I know this break will have been for nothing if these changes and lessons don’t stick. So I have to keep going and make sure it doesn’t become an addiction. It’s definitely time to set boundaries. I shouldn’t check it as much as I used to. I should definitely be more positive with what I post (again, I tend to overshare sometimes). What I do post needs to be relevant and meaningful, not useless or attention-seeking. Perhaps most importantly, I should go back to basics and use it for its main purpose–to stay connected with family and friends near and far. Communication is sometimes a weakness of mine, so this will be a good test for me. Social media was never meant to be about likes or stories or memes. It will never be a substitute for face-to-face communication, but it can help reinforce our relationships, which is a must during a pandemic.

Can I do all of these things? We shall see. It’s time to hold myself accountable, you know, test myself. I can test my students–why can’t I test myself?

And if I pass that test, my life story will be something to be proud of.

Our Greatest Teacher

by mikebev25
You can’t get to the top of the mountain without a few falls along the way.

A few weeks ago, I had a bit of an out-of-body experience.

It was a beautiful Saturday afternoon and I had nothing else to do, so I decided to check out a park on the east side of town. The park was very nice and gave me some time to think about the important few weeks that would follow in my job search, the census, taxes, etc. After a couple hours perusing the scenery, I recognized that I was near one of the places that defined my Prague experience.

What was that place? A science lab.

What in the name of Petr Arenberger’s property records does a science lab have to do with teaching English?

You see, in my current job teaching adults, the language schools provide a wide range of different clients. I’ve worked with students from IT, banking, sales, pharmaceuticals, rubber stamp creation (my personal favorite), and yes, scientists. Most times, the matching of teachers to clients is fairly random and you just hope there’s chemistry there. Many students and I have been a perfect match. Others have not, but after a while, we’ve made it work.

And some just flat out don’t work at all.

Let’s just say that if the scientists had had the chance to see me in their match queue before they met me, they would have swiped left.

It was one of the first clients (it was actually four courses, but they generally all had the same issues) I accepted after my TEFL program, and let’s just say it was Buffalo Sabres-esque.

It was bad.

Being a new teacher (or at least new to TEFL at the time), I mostly went by the book and didn’t want to ruffle any feathers. I taught my early lessons in the exact same format as my lessons at The Language House (for those who don’t know, that was my TEFL program, 10/10 would recommend). It was almost to the point of robotic. I had no idea how to choose a textbook. The concept of what was level appropriate was still brand new to me. Time management? What time management? The combination of these things plus all the administrative tasks forced my head to spin.

All things considered, I still did fine with most of my early courses.

But not this one.

In the seven weeks I had the course, there were numerous complaints about me and my teaching style. Every time I breathed too loud, the students had something to say about it. Demoing (showing students what to do before they work on an exercise) was stupid to them. My playful “Mike and Ike” shtick, a demo technique which I used frequently at TLH, was frowned upon. I vividly remember one student raising his hand to shout at me and tell me the material was too easy. My error correction methods were reported to be confusing and nonexistent (they were there, I promise). The business textbook that I chose for a group of supervisors and managers was laughed at.

Quickly, attendance dwindled, as the students clearly were not buying what I was selling. I felt as if my credibility was sunk.

After every lesson, there seemed to be an email about these courses. I got called in to meet with the academic director and had to try and defend every little thing I was doing. All this during a three-month probation period when my job was on the line.

I tried numerous solutions but nothing worked. Finally, after about a month, the client decided to pull the plug on me. I was replaced. I continued to teach the course for a few weeks while a new teacher was found. Luckily, other clients saw the good things in me, so thankfully, the language school stuck with me, which is something I’ll be forever grateful for.

But I’d still be lying if I said it weren’t a tough pill to swallow. And it wasn’t just because I’m a people pleaser, either.

I remember having serious reservations about continuing in the teaching field. I was totally gutted and had lost a lot of my confidence. As a whole, the first three months with my initial language school were not my proudest (the scientists were not the only situation in which this sort of thing happened, but it’s definitely the one I remember the most).

But as I have with a lot of things in life, I somehow found a way to stick it out.

I think it was a combination of my resiliency, adaptability, and being locked into a contract with stiff financial penalties if you don’t adhere to the three-month notice period. After this experience, I made adjustments. Lots of adjustments. I stopped using or modified a number of the teaching techniques that fell flat with the scientists. I stopped trying to be a hero and do everything on my own and recognized that I needed to ask for help from fellow teachers and mentors. I started taking my needs analysis activity (basically a survey at the beginning of each course in which you ask the students about their English goals and what they want from you) seriously instead of treating it as a formality or throwaway activity. I communicated with the students and made it a point to ask them for their feedback so they could give it to me instead of going over my head and right to the school. And as little time as I had, I really took the time to more carefully choose textbooks for students rather than just blindly forcing one upon them.

The results were noticeable. After the first three months, my students were generally much happier. Following the early speed bumps, I did not lose any more students or courses due to the quality of my teaching (and it’s been a year and a half now). While what happened with the scientists and the others was not ideal and I was embarrassed by it at the time, it did teach me some powerful lessons. No lesson was more important, however, than the value of never giving up.

That’s why I sought out the science lab on that sunny Saturday afternoon. I wanted to show myself how far I and my teaching have come. Some people are afraid to look back at their failures and never think about them again, but I’m not one of those people. Mistakes make us human. No one has ever gotten to where they’ve gotten to without a mistake or two along the way. It’s how you react to the mistakes which is the most critical thing.

When I stood before those scientists, I was a new, uncertain, and nervous teacher just getting into the world of TEFL. But as I looked at the building on that day a few weeks ago, I realized that the teacher of a year and a half ago would be pretty proud of the teacher now. If I had another chance to teach those students, I’m confident that things would have gone differently and that I would have learned from my mistakes to the point where they would have actually been impressed. The evolution has led to many great opportunities, including the new job that awaits me. If I had just given up and gone home because of one bad experience, I would have missed out on so much. In the past 18 months, I’ve seen so many beautiful places around Europe (as many as COVID has allowed), met some of the best friends I’ve had here (fun fact: most of my good friends are not people from my TEFL month or even TEFL program), had amazing experiences such as summer camp and holiday celebrations, and learned so much about myself.

Why am I being so candid about this? I can already hear my family yelling at me, “Mike, you don’t want a future employer getting wind of this stuff!” Fair enough. But that part isn’t as important to me as sending a critical message that people in all walks of life can benefit from.

That critical message is this: One failure wasn’t the worst thing in the world.

Sometimes, I forget that. For me, this failure was actually a good thing in a way as it taught me so much. Obviously, we should never be OK with failure, but if we’re also not OK with learning from the failure, then we’re doing something wrong. If we’re not using our failures to become better, we are OK with failure. If you’re OK with failure, then you’re just the Buffalo Sabres front office. Aim higher and don’t be disconnected to the star players in your lives! I mean, Jack Eichel has learned something from his failures, and that is that he deserves much better than the dog-and-pony show which is the Buffalo Sabres. Just like the carrot-topped captain of the most dysfunctional franchise in sports (sorry, Houston Texans, we have you beat), failure can teach you something, too. In fact, failure is truly our greatest teacher.

You know, that sounded really good. Why don’t I say that again?

Failure is truly our greatest teacher.

Yes, it’s true. As I embark on my third year in Prague and a new chapter in my teaching experience, I’ll always think back to those scientists. I’ve said many times that teaching is a two-way street and that teachers should also learn something from their students. Frankly, those scientists didn’t teach me a thing about science. Instead, they taught me something far more important…

I am stronger than I’ll ever know.

Not Good at Goodbyes

by mikebev25

The award-winning British singer Sam Smith once wrote a song called “Too Good at Goodbyes.”

Maybe he can give me some lessons.

No, not singing lessons. Singing and me are a lost cause. I’m talking about lessons in goodbyes.

Unlike Mr. Smith, I’m not good at goodbyes. At all. And it’s unfortunate because I’ll be having to say a lot of them in the weeks and months ahead.

No, I’m not leaving Prague. We established that last week. That’s not the reason I’m writing this blog. Instead, I wanted to shed light on this topic because I’ll be bidding adieu to more than one good friend this month. These are friends who I’ve experienced some great times with. These are friends who have helped me and stuck with me through difficult times. These are some of the first people I truly got to know in Prague. And now they’re off to other locales. It sucks. Yes, there is the possibility of communication through social media and what not, but that is simply no substitute for face-to-face interactions. In a way, I’m happy for my friends that are leaving because they will be pursuing opportunities which seem very exciting, but selfishly, I wish they would stay. But it’s out of my control.

This reminds me of when I first said goodbye to my family when I left for Prague nearly two years ago. With all due respect to my departing friends, the current situations pale in comparison. Saying goodbye to my family was one of the hardest, gut-wrenching things I’ve ever had to do. The fear of the unknown…how I would do in Prague, when I might be back in New York, and being far away from my folks for the first time in my life…made it even worse. I still miss my family. I’m sure every expat who came before me has felt the same way. But after a while, time made it slightly easier.

There’s also another dimension to this “period of goodbyes,” if you will. As you saw last week (and if you didn’t see it, please go read it), I’ve accepted a new job with a school in Prague. That means I will soon have to say goodbye to my current adult students. That won’t be easy, either. These are people who did more than just pay my bills. They invited me into their workplaces and into their lives. I built a relationship with each of them. They were patient with me as I figured out the world of Prague and the world of TEFL. I taught them many things, but they also taught me many things, and for that I’ll be forever grateful. They and I established routines and had countless insightful conversations. While I look forward to my new opportunity with excitement and humility, I’ll miss these students and wish them well. Furthermore, I’ll be saying goodbye to the language schools that gave this kid from upstate New York a chance to make a special impact on the lives of others. Times weren’t always amazing, but for the most part, we had a good working relationship and gained each other’s respect.

As I think about this weird time of transition in my life, I am appreciative to at least have the chance to say goodbye. Over the years, I’ve had so many relationships and friendships end without warning. Most meaningfully, both of my grandmothers passed away after relatively short illnesses. We had an idea it was coming, but not a great one. However, I distinctly remember my grandmother’s last words to me being “I love you, too.” As I look back with gratitude this Mother Day’s weekend, that memory will forever stick with me. Always appreciate the sacrifices your parents and grandparents made for you. Tell them that. Hug them. Cherish the time you have with them.

While not nearly as significant as the relationships as I had with my grandmothers, I’ve also had too many friendships end without warning. This has happened for various reasons. Of course, a number of them have ended due to time and distance, which is what I fear will happen with the ones I mentioned at the beginning. Since I moved to Prague, I’ve seen people leave without even saying goodbye. I know that, in many cases, it was due to COVID and them having to leave quickly, but others just up and left. I remember one person I got very close to over here abruptly leaving and then, not a week later, me going to their Facebook page and seeing the “Add Friend” button. Excuse me?

One way or the other, goodbyes are extremely painful for me. It sounds corny, but everyone I meet and develop a relationship with, whether it’s a familial one or friendly one, owns a piece of my heart. As someone with social anxiety, I’m especially grateful for all the people who have given me a chance to make and maintain a friendship.

I know some people have kicked me to the curb because of the social anxiety, which sometimes makes me not be the world’s greatest friend. I’ve gone months without seeing people I used to see regularly (although COVID is somewhat to blame for that, too). I’m left out of things I wouldn’t have been left out of before. When it comes to texting, I’m basically the Buffalo Sabres. I regret all of that. But you know what? I’ve gotten up off the mat and made new friends, while also strengthening other relationships in my life and taking some time to take care of myself so the social anxiety doesn’t run as rampant anymore. Long story short, the people who matter will look past the shortcomings and make the effort to stay in your life no matter what happens.

Never take the important people in your life for granted. You just never know when things (and people) can change.

(Picture: A photo of a rainbow from last year at summer camp. To me, there’s always been something about rainbows and goodbyes. I can’t really put my finger on exactly what that is, but enjoy the photo!)

Life Update

by mikebev25
Is the sun setting on my Prague experience…or is it rising on a third year in Prague? You’ll have to read on to find out!

The past few months haven’t been the easiest.

Between the cold weather, COVID restrictions, and the monotony of looking at the same four walls day in and day out, it’s been a struggle. Not to mention having to do taxes and go through the Czech census (the deadline’s in nine days for those of you who still haven’t finished it).

Admittedly, my mental and physical health haven’t been in the best place, either. I know that I haven’t exactly been the best version of myself recently. It’s resulted in me not always saying or doing the right things or perhaps oversharing on social media. Specifically to any of my friends who might be reading this, I far well know that I haven’t been the greatest friend lately. I promise I’ll do better. I’ve just had a lot of things on my mind.

One of these things has been a rather innocuous-looking question that I’ve been getting a lot.

How long are you planning to stay in Prague?

With another school year about to come to a close, it’s something that I’ve had to carefully ponder over the last couple of months. That one simple question has led to a number of other smaller questions.

Do you want to keep working with adults? What kind of school would you like to work for? Contract or Zivno? Do you want to stay in Prague or move elsewhere? Who’s going to win the Kentucky Derby? (For the record: I picked Highly Motivated. The winner crossed the finish line approximately 18 hours ago. He’s expected to cross the finish line some time next week.)

Anyway, I fought long and hard with my mind about the question of staying another year in Prague. Like I said, it’s been a difficult year for my mental health. A number of people I’ve grown close to here have left or are preparing to leave before long. While COVID is getting better here, it’s still not going away, and for “freelancers” like me, there’s no possibility of being vaccinated for at least two to three months. While I’m blessed to have shelter, my living situation could be better, and I haven’t been a fan of it for a while now. But I can’t really change it at the moment, because, you know…contracts and censuses.

There were a lot of lengthy texts exchanged between me and my mom, and if I could be fully transparent for a moment, the possibility of me returning to New York did come up more than once. My family has been pushing that option for months now. Based on that and everything I stated above, it seems like it should’ve been a slam dunk, right?

Hold your Medina Spirits and Mandalouns.

(for those who aren’t as well versed in horse racing, those were the 1-2 finishers in yesterday’s derby)

Something deep down inside of me wanted to give Prague another chance. I’m not even sure what that something was. I felt that I owed it to myself to at least do my due diligence.

I applied to several jobs. After careful reflection, I decided that, if I was to stay in Prague, my goal would be to work with children or teens. Working with adults has been rewarding, and I’ve been fortunate to work with two language schools that have treated me very well, but I recognized that working with the younger folk was my true passion. Plus, the opportunity to have a consistent income, consistent schedule, and BENEFITS appealed to me. When you teach adults, they plan their lessons based on their schedules and what works for them, not you. This can result in me teaching until 8 p.m. most nights. With all due respect to all those I currently work with, I want to have time in the evenings to unwind and enjoy myself. Also, when people cancel lessons more than 24 hours prior to the start of the lesson, you get the same amount as Highly Motivated earned in the race yesterday: ZERO.

The job application process actually started out nicely. Every school I applied to at least got me in the door (either the literal one or the virtual one) for an interview. Some interviews went better than others. There were countless emails exchanged. It was a long road. Each opportunity had its pros and cons.

After a while, I zeroed in on one job and they zeroed in on me.

The only question left for me to ask myself was (drumroll please): Was this job worth it for me to stay in Prague for one more year?

Yes, it was. I’m running it back for a third year in the Czech Republic.

I’ve accepted a position at an elementary school. I can’t get into too many details because the contract is not officially signed, but all the people who had to be notified have been. Essentially, I’ll be teaching English, math, physics, and information technology to students in Grades 4 through 8. A full-time schedule in one place. What seems to be a great learning and working environment. Benefits. Coworkers.

I’m excited.

I don’t want to toot my horn too loudly, but this outcome speaks to my persistence. Initially, I was actually rejected by this school, but it decided to open up more positions, so I tried again. It also shows that I hung on through all of the lonely days in isolation, texts home, tears shed, sleepless nights, and stress eating. I hope that this new opportunity will tell me that I made the right decision to keep going, even when it was tempting to jump on the first plane back to Albany.

So why didn’t I jump on that plane?

As unhappy I’ve been at times here, I really just didn’t think I’d be any happier there. Yes, I’d have the support of my family (if you’re reading this, I’m going to make every effort to come and visit this summer), but what else would I really have? What would I do for work? Go into the completely oversaturated online teaching market? Nope. Been there, done that. I’d have to get a car and a new phone plan. Where would I live? Would my social life actually be any better?

And oh by the way, it’s upstate New York. For those who have never been there, you’re really only missing trees and construction. Prague is way more exciting.

I think the big reason I entertained the idea of going back was because I felt under supported here. There were times when I felt like I had no friends (at least no real ones). Times I believed I was a burden to people. Going back to the safe space of my family would surely help alleviate that, no?

Anxiety is one hell of a liar. I legitimately feel that anxiety was lying to me or making my issues seem worse than they actually were.

Despite what anxiety was attempting to tell me, it wasn’t the right time to go back. I just wasn’t ready to end this experience, especially considering that things are opening up or will very soon. Traveling out of the country could be doable again in the near future. That’s one of the main things I came over here to do. Why leave now when it’s just getting good?

Sure, there will be obstacles. Even though I don’t do this for the money, teaching in Prague will never be the most lucrative profession. Not all of the 26 lessons I will teach every week will go as planned. There will still be the ordeal of dealing with the Czech offices from time to time. Friends will continue to come and go. And of course, COVID will still be around in some way, shape, or form (RIP Sally Jovell, my fourth-grade teacher who used to love that phrase) for a while.

But when you see a chance, you have to take it. And when a decision feels right, it probably is right.

I think that because I now know what the plan is for the next year, I’ll be more at ease. Less stressed. More open to new experiences. My hope is that this will help me be the best version of myself each and every day.

I have no choice but to be the best version of myself. Those kids at my new school need to see a role model. Someone they could and should aspire to be. If I’m doing that, it’s okay if they don’t understand the word or grammar concept on the first try. I’m still doing my job.

When I first left for Prague on that humid June day in 2019, I told my family that I might be back home in a month. Maybe a few months. But certainly no more than a year.

No more than a year? And now we’re heading into year 3?

Wow. We’ve come a long way.

Bring on year 3. I can’t wait to get started.

The Power of Meditation

by mikebev25
Meditation is very helpful in dealing with the rollercoaster that is life. (Photo: My own personal photo from my February 2020 trip to Vienna.)

This past week has been one of the fastest, fiercest, most demanding rollercoasters I’ve been on in quite a long time. If there are mistakes in this blog, I apologize, because simply put, my brain is mush.

We’ve had a lot of good: Exciting job prospects for next year, high-quality lessons with a number of positive reviews from students/employers, and catching up with friends I hadn’t seen in a while. There’s also been a lot of not-so-good: Bad news regarding my U.S. tax situation, several new and unexpected things being put on my plate when I already have so much to deal with, and being left out of other friend gatherings. (Dear social anxiety, you suck. Love, Mike.)

With my mood (and my blood pressure) swinging so much from day to day, I thought this would be the perfect time to let you all in on a little secret. In fact, this secret has been a big reason why I’ve been able to get through such a ridiculous week.

I meditate.

I know it’s not necessarily a common thing for males to do, but I do it.

My friend introduced it to me a few months ago, and at first, I wasn’t sold. Similar to how I’ve never believed (and still don’t believe, maybe one day) in astronomy, I just couldn’t get into it. I tried and would usually be pretty consistent for a few days, but I noticed that it wasn’t doing anything for me. I would either not have time, not wake up early enough in the morning (when the sun comes up at 8 a.m. in January, who could blame you?), or get headaches. For a while, I gave up on it. Because I’m extremely Type A, I knew that even if I did it, I’d be stressed either way.

After a while, however, I realized that those were just excuses. We’ll never become anything close to the best versions of ourselves if we make excuses. So I did some research on meditation, talked to my friend about the benefits it had in her life, and decided to give it that second chance it so richly deserved.

And boy am I glad I did.

I now have a morning routine that I can count on. Wake up, meditate for 10-15 minutes, and pray. All before the first lesson of the day. If the weather cooperates (are any other Prague people really getting tired of the constant rain and cold?), I crack open my window to let in the fresh air of a fresh day. I know that many people like to meditate in the evening, but I do it in the morning because I just think it’s a great way to get your mind cleared and focused going into a new day and a clean slate.

Meditation has helped me feel better and more organized. I’ve been laughing more and having more fun. I’ve been making smarter decisions. I’ve had more energy and believe the quality of my work has been better. Since my mind has been clear, I’ve been more willing to let things go. On the few days I haven’t done it, there’s been a stark difference. I’ve been more stressed, more rushed, more sluggish, less patient with myself and others, more likely to catastrophize, and taken things a lot more seriously.

Like I said before, meditation does not and cannot change the fact that I am very Type A. Anxiety is still going to have days when it wins. We definitely had some of those days this past week. But with a clear conscience and an open mind, you can be in a better position to handle those days.

A clear conscience helps you become a better person. My goal each and every day is to be a better son, brother, uncle, teacher, and friend than I was the day before. If I’m not doing that, then why am I here? Meditation leads to self-improvement, which leads to so many new doors being opened on a personal, professional, and social level. If you’ve read this blog before, you know how passionate I am about bettering myself. Maybe I’m too passionate about it. But there certainly are worse things to be too passionate about…

In order to truly better yourself, you not only need that clear conscience, but you need to reexamine your thoughts and decide if these thoughts will lead to success for you. That being said, I close with a powerful quote that I saw on Facebook the other day…

“The goal of meditation isn’t to control your thoughts, it’s to stop letting them control you.”

As someone who has struggled with this his whole life, I will say that meditation has helped me do a better job of blocking out negative thoughts or turning them into positive ones. I still have a long way to go with this, but I know that if I continue meditating, I get there.

I need to get there. Otherwise, I’ll just continue to be sucked in by the rollercoaster that is life.

And I don’t like rollercoasters.

Who Am I? Who Are You?

by mikebev25

Who am I?

If you asked me that question, it would probably take me a while to answer it. In fact, I’m not even sure I know how I’d answer it.

After thinking about it, I did a little experiment. Over the weekend, I posted a story to my Instagram and Facebook pages asking a simple question: What is the first word that comes to mind when you think of me? I also sent private messages to some people who I consider close friends. I did not ask any family members because they would offer too biased of a view and throw off the experiment.

This was not intended to be an ego-stroking endeavor, although some of the responses really made me smile and brightened up a time in my life that hasn’t been the easiest.

Before we get to the responses and what all of this means, let’s make sure we have a working definition of the word “identity.” Google states that it is “the fact of being who or what a person or thing is.” Fair enough.

It made me curious: What is my fact of being? Who is Michael Jude Bevevino?

To get warmed up, I wrote down ten words that I believe describe me. I later narrowed it down to five. The five that I chose were Christian, teacher, selfless, resilient, and courageous. The first two shouldn’t need an explanation. Selfless because I at least try to put others before myself. Resilient because I find ways to bounce back from losses in life. Courageous because I took this step of coming to Prague and changing my life forever.

Now, let’s see my five favorite words that others picked. Angel, kind (there were several different variations of this one, including kind-hearted and kindness), soft-hearted, non-judgmental, and quirky.

Wow. Quite the gamut there.

Let’s return to the main objective of this exercise. Again, it wasn’t to boost my ego or to make me feel better about myself. I wouldn’t have had selfless in my own top five if it had been. Instead, it was to help me answer that “Who Am I?” question. What is my identity?

Why couldn’t I just have answered that myself with my own words? After all, people have told me far too often that I care too much about what other people think. Yes, I’m a people pleaser. That’s a very small part of my identity I’m not proud of. And that’s why it didn’t make the cut for my own top five words. Anyway, my point is that when it comes to identity, your own view can easily become biased or clouded. You become so caught up in everyday life that you either don’t stop and think about it or you don’t give yourself enough credit. For people who struggle with anxiety, this is tenfold.

I like to think I’ve had a positive impact on others since I moved here, and seeing some of the responses to my “survey” (in my opinion, a far more productive and meaningful one than the preposterous census that’s currently happening in these parts) confirmed that. Your relationships with others and the way you make them feel can also help to mold your identity and give you a more powerful sense of self. So while you can’t allow others’ opinions to hold too much weight, getting some feedback about your strengths and weaknesses can be extremely helpful so you can become the best version of yourself. I ask for feedback from my students all the time and it’s helped me to become a better teacher. Speaking of which, does anyone else think that this exercise would make a great idea as a lesson or at least a warmer?

Why exactly is our identity important? We are more than just bodies taking up space or a number in the census. The parts that make us up, whether they are soft-hearted, angelic, quirky, or whatever, all come together to form a whole. If we just went with the basics like man, woman, good, bad, etc., that would be okay, but it wouldn’t be taking that deep look into your own personal and moral compasses. If you’re merely trying to be good enough, then perhaps you need to take another look at your own identity. Our identity is far more than a name on a residence permit. It is the experiences we’ve had, the challenges we’ve endured, and the person we want our future generations to be proud of. Know your identity. Embrace your identity.

Next time you feel like you’re simply a body taking up space, remember that you have value. There are feelings and emotions in this space. You are unique. You have a lot of things that define you, and these things can’t define just anybody. No one else is you and no one in the future can ever be you. The world would not be the same without you, and that’s the biggest thing I remind myself of when lessons don’t go well, I have an argument with a family member or friend, or on those days when anxiety just wins.

Now that I’m starting to sound like Dr. Seuss, it’s probably a good time to get back to the main question…

Who am I?

I’m Mike. I’m an selfless, resilient, courageous, angelic, kind, soft-hearted, non-judgmental, quirky Christian teacher.

Who are you? Perhaps most importantly, who do want to be? What do you want to define your identity for future generations? Do you want to embrace your identity and use it to make your world (and the world as a whole) a better place? Or do you just want to be another body taking up space or being counted in the Scitani? (Scitani is the Czech word for census.)

It’s up to you.

(Picture: Personal photo of the Lennon Wall in Prague. I thought it would be a good photo for this post because it’s a great example of a bunch of small things coming together to form a meaningful whole. John Lennon had quite an identity that others should strive to be proud of.)

When the Final Score Doesn’t Matter

by mikebev25

At the beginning of 2021, one of my New Year’s resolutions was to make a “Good Days Scoreboard.” Essentially, I would keep track of the number of good days I had versus the number of bad days. If I had a good day, I’d remember everything I did that day and be more motivated to make it happen every day. If I had a bad day, I’d see what lessons I could learn and apply them so that the bad day wouldn’t be as likely to happen again. Winning streaks would give me a spring in my step. Losing streaks would give me a fire under my rear end.

I discussed the idea with some of my friends. One of my friends loved it and started doing it herself. On the other hand, a couple other friends called it “a terrible idea.”

But I was determined to at least give it a free trial.

And after what turned out to be a 100-day free trial, the verdict is in…

I don’t like it. I’m not buying the other 265 days.

The first reason is that I had no real criteria. What exactly defined a “good day?” A lot of days, I just did it based on how I felt at the end of the day. In retrospect, it might have been better to set a couple of goals for each day and have that determine which side of the scoreboard it would go on. You need a rubric to grade an essay–you can’t just put a number on there depending on if it feels right or not. Second, I was marking a lot of days as bad days for silly reasons. I distinctly remember days when a number of things went right, but I marked it as a bad day because someone didn’t return a text. I’d also often put a day on the bad side because I saw a social media post showing someone else living a better life than I was (or so I perceived it). Yes, this scoreboard actually made me compare myself to others, something I’m really trying hard to avoid. There were also times when I’d have four or five things legitimately go well and one thing went badly, but I’d the one bad thing consume me. Some bad days happened because of things I couldn’t control, like additional coronavirus restrictions being put into place.

Come to think of it, something like this might not be the best idea for someone with anxiety. I would have periods in which I had several bad days in a row, making me feel hopeless. Of course, the win streaks would be accompanied by the feeling of waiting for the other shoe to drop. Even when things are great, people with anxiety fear that the bottom is about to fall out sooner rather than later. I have too many important things to do to waste time with that back-and-forth. Speaking of back-and-forth, I’d often debate for hours at the end of the day whether or not it was a good day. On many days, nothing really good happened, but nothing really bad happened, either. This created another gray area which forced it to become more stressful than it was actually worth. Perhaps it would have been worth putting a “neutral day” category in there? Meh…it’s water under the bridge now.

Clearly, I have my reasons for discontinuing this scoreboard. And we haven’t even gotten to the most important one yet.

Ladies and gentlemen, it’s all about perspective.

The coronavirus pandemic has taught me that any day when you can say you’re happy and healthy at the end of it is a good day.

Yes, I’ve had “bad days.” But my bad days are nothing compared to what many people are facing around the world. There are far too many overloaded hospitals with gravely ill COVID patients as exhausted medical personnel try to take care of them. We see families who will forever have an empty seat at the dinner table thanks to this pandemic. What about the countless hard workers who have lost their jobs due to COVID-related budget cuts? Honestly, COVID has not impacted me nearly as much as many others I know. I’m one of the lucky ones and certainly don’t take that for granted.

On a non-COVID note, there are starving children in war zones. There are homeless people who would kill to have the home I have or the clothes I wear.

I still have good health. And a place to live. Clothes on my back. Food and shelter.

And oh, yeah…a chance to live in a foreign country and immerse myself in another culture. I proved to myself and to others that I could make this work. COVID couldn’t take that away from me.

I understand that I have so much more than many others have. Every time I question whether or not I’m doing a good job, that’s what I come back to.

Life is much more than good days versus bad days. It’s about living life to the fullest and being the best version of yourself. We need to live good LIVES, not a collection of good days.

When you live a good life, the final score doesn’t matter.

Hope Springs Eternal

by mikebev25

Happy Easter, everyone!

Now that all of you are (hopefully) recovered from the heart attacks I gave you with my April Fools’ Day post, I thought I’d take this Easter Sunday to tell you about why I love the month of April. It might be month #4 on the calendar, but it’s month #1 in my heart.

First and foremost, it’s a very symbolic month for my family. My brother and sister were born in April, and sadly, my grandmother passed away in April. I also remember several springtime weekends/short holidays we took to Cape Cod when I was high school. Of course, speaking of that time in my life, I also fondly look back on all the spring breaks I had as a kid. In my area of the country, spring break would usually occur in April. Back then, I wasn’t keen on traveling, but it was fun to relax, play video games, and have no responsibilities. Those were the days…

As a kid, I especially loved Easter, which often falls in April. No disrespect to Christmas or Thanksgiving, but I loved going around my house and looking for eggs. This would quickly be followed by an indulgence of chocolate and other sweet treats. Occasionally, my parents would throw a new Playstation game or some toys in there as well. Then, we went to church and usually had something pretty tasty for dinner. Ham, prime rib, and I believe there may have been one year when Easter and St. Patrick’s Day were close to each other on the calendar, so we had corned beef and cabbage. Not exactly April-related, but still yummy. All this talk about food is making me hungry, so let’s move on.

A church in Prague.

As Catholics, we were taught to sacrifice something for Lent. Another reason I’ve always liked April and Easter so much is because you have an opportunity to get that back. Over the years, I’ve given up things like certain unhealthy foods or restaurants, social media, video games, or bad habits like swearing or being negative. I think giving up something for Lent teaches us something really important. It allows us to spend less time on trivial, material things which don’t help us be the best versions of ourselves. Since that one thing is absent from our lives, we can spend more time with God with thoughtful prayer and reflection. Full disclosure: I copped out this year and went the food route. Chicken wings and tenders, to be exact. However, if I could do it over again, I would have given up checking the coronavirus numbers on Facebook first thing every morning. Next year, I’m definitely giving it more thought and giving up something that will have more of an impact. Something becomes absent so that God can be more present (and so that we can be more present in our own lives). Looking back, I don’t think chicken wings really accomplished that. Oh, well, there’s always next year. And I’m getting hungry again, so on to the next one…

One thing I never could give up for Lent would be sports. Well, maybe I could, but the main reason that it would be so difficult is that April is the best time of year for sports. The beginning of baseball season meets the crowning of a new college basketball champion. The world’s best golfers gather in Augusta, Georgia for the Masters, the first major of the year and my favorite golf tournament. I realize that having it in November was better than not having it at all last year, but it just didn’t feel right. Honestly, it just felt like another run-of-the-mill tournament on the golf calendar. In 2021, it returns to its rightful place. The NFL Draft gives all 32 NFL teams (well, maybe not the Houston Texans) new hope for a new year. Usually, the NHL and NBA Playoffs would also headline the month, although the calendar is still gradually working back to normal after the delays caused by COVID. Similar to the Masters, hockey just felt completely out of place last year when the playoffs were contested in August and September (although the Sabres still weren’t in it, so at least that part was familiar). For soccer/non-American football fans, there is the Champions League. Also on this side of the pond, Formula One is in full swing. So as you can see, there’s an abundance of sports to cater to any fan, and don’t listen to the people who will try and tell you that October is the best time of year for sports, because they’re wrong. They’ll say, “It’s the World Series!” “NFL season!” “The new NBA season!” “College Football!” Here’s the reality–the baseball postseasons have been relative snoozefests for several years now (last year in particular was a total BORE), the really important NFL games haven’t started yet, and the NBA is overrated and has no parity. And you think the NBA’s parity is bad? Look at college football? Alabama. Clemson. Alabama again. Clemson again. Maaaaaaaybe sprinkle in some Ohio State or Oklahoma if we’re lucky. Rinse and repeat. I rest my case.

When baseball season and the Masters get underway, that’s the sign that spring has officially arrived. Obviously, it wouldn’t be possible to play these sports if the weather weren’t warming up (although an indoor golf tournament would be interesting to watch). This leads to another reason I love April–warmer weather. This winter was four months long. It felt like four years. You sometimes have those Aprils in which spring and winter go at it like optimists and pessimists on the Prague Expats Facebook page. But typically by the end of the month, you’re in the clear when it comes to snow and cold. By April, the clocks have been turned ahead, so you can enjoy those 7:30 or 8:00 sunsets. During last year’s lockdown, being able to go for walks in the April weather was so liberating and lifted my spirits. Go for a solo nature walk every so often–it’s such a great way to clear your head and experience the beauty of God’s creation.

I want to close by coming back to the true message of Easter. I feel that this is something that people often forget. Easter is the day when Jesus rose from the dead. It marks the moment when death was defeated and hope sprung eternal. Jesus died for our sins and then came back. That’s why April and Easter make me feel so hopeful. So the next time you want to give up, remember that Jesus himself was once down and defeated. But he never gave up. And that’s why we have the blessings we have today. Jesus’ perseverance is a reminder that no matter how bad things might be right now, there is hope. Hope always springs eternal.

Jesus rose again. So can you.

The Vltava River in Prague. Better those people than me in the kayaks!
Wenceslas Square on a warm March evening.
Warmer weather=more time to spend at Přírodní park Hostivař-Záběhlice, my absolute favorite spot in Prague!
Stromovka Park, another place I’ll be spending a lot of time this spring and summer.

A Difficult Decision

by mikebev25

You know that I’m always thinking about self-improvement and being the best version of myself. The pandemic has given me plenty of time to ponder where I’m at in life and where I want to go next. After careful reflection, I’ve decided to make five significant changes in my life, including an extremely difficult, life-changing decision.

This isn’t easy. But I’m ready to share and feel like you, the readers, who have been so special to me during my time in Prague, deserve to hear it.

  1. Let’s start with the big one. This August, I will be leaving Prague and moving to Seoul, South Korea. I’ve signed a contract to teach at a high school for the next two years. I’m excited! South Korea appeals to me because it gives me a chance to have a brand new experience in a culture that is much different from America or Prague. When I took tae kwon do lessons a few years back, I dabbled into Korean customs and enjoyed learning about them. Plus, the financial security that South Korea brings is appealing for obvious reasons. I’ll be making nearly double the money I make now, and with student loans, that’s kind of a big deal. I’ll be forever grateful to Prague and the Czech people for taking me in and making me feel at home. I’ll miss the friends and students I’ve met over the past two years. But I’m confident that this is the best decision for me. It’s time for a new challenge and a new chapter. International Mike is about to become even more international. By the way, beginning in August, the name of this blog will be “Seoul Searching: My Journey to South Korea.” I also considered “Mikenam Style,” but it just didn’t sound right.
  2. When I set foot in the South Korean capital, I’ll look at bit different. I recently bought glasses and plan on wearing them all the time. For many months now, I’ve been dealing with migraine headaches, and my doctor recommended blue light glasses. I hate the way I look in glasses, but I need to get rid of these headaches once and for all so I can be healthy and be the best version of myself for my new students in Seoul. This, too, wasn’t an easy decision, and it will take some getting used to. The crater in my bank account will be a reminder of that. But I hope you will all like the new look. I’m not posting a picture because I want you to see it in person and not spoil it for you!
  3. The glasses aren’t the only change to my appearance. I’ve also decided to grow a beard. It’s coming in nicely. You see, I’ve been told for years that I have a baby face, and most people are surprised to hear that I’m 31 years old. I want to look more mature, which I think the glasses will also help accomplish. My dad has always had a beard, so I figured I’d try it out. If I don’t like it, I can always shave it. Again, no pictures–you’ll have to see it for yourself in person. Plus, I really hate selfies, especially selfies in the mirror. Selfies in the mirror at the gym are just repulsive. Moving on…
  4. I’m not the only one moving to South Korea. I recently adopted a dog. His name is Honza. He’s a German shepherd. He’s one BIG boy. Yep, Honza’s coming to Seoul with me. I’ve already made all of the arrangements with the airline and with my host family in Seoul. It’s going to cost me a good bit to get him there, but we can do it! You’re probably thinking–“Mike, why get a dog now if you’re moving halfway around the world?” Well, I wanted something that will always make me remember Prague. I know that when I’m in Seoul, I’ll have some long, lonely days. It will be difficult for me to make friends at first. I’ll look at Honza and have a friend, while remembering the good times and people of Prague. The name “Honza” is a Czech nickname for “Jan,” a very common male name here. Jan is similar to John, so it’s kind of like a John/Jack thing. I’ve always thought it was a cool name.
  5. Building on the theme of needing some change, I’ve decided to root for some different sports teams. I’m from New York, so it’s time to stop being weird and root for some New York (or at least Northeast) teams. In baseball, I’m changing my socks from white to red and becoming a Boston Red Sox fan. Like I said, I want to root for New York-ish teams. I can’t stand the Yankees, and the Mets are the Mets, so, yeah, Boston it is. In hockey, I’m kicking the Sabres to the curb (should’ve done that a long time ago) and becoming a Pittsburgh Penguins fan. I briefly rooted for them as a small child, so it’s not totally new. Yes, the Sabres are a New York team, but are they really a professional New York team? I’ve had it with the Sabres’ ownership. They’ve lost a fan and will probably lose many more with the way they’re running the franchise. Moving from the bottom to the top, the most gut-wrenching thing to do was to give up my Tampa Bay Buccaneers fan card. They gave me a great thrill at a time in my life I really needed one, but I want to make this a wholesale change. So my new football team? The Philadelphia Eagles! I love the passion of their fan base and think Jalen Hurts is fun to watch. Randall Cunningham and Donovan McNabb were players I looked up to when I was growing up. The other options? The Bills, with the same ownership as the Sabres? Eww. The Patriots and Bill Belichick? Absolutely not. The Giants and Jets? No and no. So Philly it is. Fly, Eagles, Fly! Do you think they have any Eagles-themed bars in South Korea? I guess we’ll just have to find out.

I realize this is a lot and may take some time for you all to process. You’re welcome to send me any questions that you may have. I suspect the first question I will be getting is a simple “Why?” Why am I doing all of this?

I’d be happy to answer. Why am I doing all of this?

Because I wanted to prank my readers with a great APRIL FOOLS’ joke.

That’s right–everything I typed above is 100% false (except for the part about the Sabres having terrible ownership). For me to move to South Korea, I’d have to move back to the States first to get a background check, and then, I’d have to wait four months for that background check to clear. And even if I could get in, I’d never bring glasses, a beard, or a dog. I’d be the ugliest, dorkiest person on the planet if I ever wore glasses. I don’t have time to maintain a beard. I’m allergic to most dogs. And yes, I’m a firm believer that you stay with your sports teams through thick (the Bucs) and thin (the Sabres).

I apologize if I gave anyone a heart attack. But I thought that after my recent deluge of serious mental health blogs, it was time to have some fun.

I think I got you guys good.

In case anyone need proof that the five decisions were nothing more than an April Fools’ joke, here’s a selfie (as much as I hate selfies) from today. No glasses, no beard, no dog, and yeah…I’m still in Prague and am still (unfortunately) a Sabres fan.

What One Rough Weekend Taught Me About Mindset

by mikebev25

This past weekend was not a banner weekend for me.

First, I had a list of goals and did not accomplish all of them. But keeping with the theme and title of this blog, let’s start with the positive. I completed my necessary lesson planning, which I guess was the most important thing, and I made my weekly venture to the supermarket. I also was able to buy more respirators…What are things I never thought I’d be saying when I started this experience for $1000, Alex? Mr. Trebek, not Ken Jennings, not Mike Richards, not Katie Couric, and CERTAINLY not Dr. Oz, will always be the end of that sentence for me. And unlike Oral Roberts, I was able to make a buzzer beater by doing my laundry on Sunday night.

(Side note: Someone please tell me how Abmas–#3 on Oral Roberts–is pronounced “Ace-Miss?” It’s a crime to the English language.)

Now, to the not-so-good. I’d been intending on cleaning my flat, and that didn’t get done. I procrastinated yet again. Totally my fault. At least my roommate did some cleaning. But I missed the boat. I also wanted to take some time and begin the Czech government’s preposterous census. That didn’t get done, either. By the way, I have a major bone to pick on this one. I don’t even talk to my roommates that much, and now I basically have to know their mother’s maiden names and what they ate for breakfast this morning? In general, a census is a good thing, but some of these questions are just plain silly. It’s just another unnecessary stressor at a time I certainly don’t need those.

A few people have told me that I’m good at this writing thing. Much appreciated. Taking their advice, I’m considering starting some additional writing on the side or even finding a part-time writing job to supplement my teaching. I wanted to get the ball rolling on that this weekend, too. However, just like Syracuse on Saturday night, I couldn’t get that ball into the net. Ugh.

If there were a tournament about making and keeping friends, I’d probably be right about where the Orange were–an #11 seed. Maybe that’s even too generous. Anyhow, I don’t have a ton of friends here, and it’s not something I’m proud of. It’s something I’m working to get better at, although the Coronavirus restrictions are not making it easy. But I do have a handful of folks I can ask to hang out every so often. I reached out to several people to do something this weekend. Every single one of them said no. Yes, I went the entire weekend without any social interaction. Uh, guys, I might have social anxiety, but I don’t bite. I promise.

I did have two very nice nature walks, albeit solo ones. But as a human who craves social interaction, I only wish that I could have shared it with someone. Not having anyone to hang out with makes me feel like I failed as a friend and as a person. That was the path my mind wandered down this weekend. Yes, I know that this is probably not the case and that the other people were just busy, but you see, social anxiety is really good at telling lies and making them sound so true.

On Saturday night, I did another thing that I was not happy about. Stressed out over the way the weekend and life in general were going, I ordered McDonald’s and just pigged out. Big Mac, large fries, a soda, and a McFlurry for good measure. Sometimes, you just feel so badly that you need comfort food. That was me. I feel like I’ve been doing a good job when it comes to eating healthier and taking care of my body and mind lately, so yeah, I let myself down and have no one to blame but myself.

So to recap, we had some unaccomplished goals, rejection, and stress eating. Not the best combination.

As Sunday evening approached, I wasn’t in the best of moods. My weekend felt like a total waste. The self-doubt and self-talk arrived in droves.

But then, I realized something.

Sitting here feeling sorry for myself isn’t going to accomplish anything. In order to get out of this rut, my mindset needs to change. I need to think positive, regardless of how things are going. The things that occurred this weekend were merely setbacks. Everyone has setbacks (except for the first-place team in my fantasy hockey league). I might have lost this battle, but I can still win the war.

The first thing I can do to plant my flag is work tirelessly to be better. I need to be a better flatmate by doing my share. It will make my roommates happier and maybe make them be willing to work with me so that we can get this census, whether we agree with it or not, done. Second, I have to be a better friend so that others will want to hang out with me and enjoy the time we have together. Most of all, I need to commit myself to being goal oriented. If I don’t like the way a certain aspect of my life is going, only I have the power to change it. A writing opportunity or a new flat isn’t going to fall on top of me. I need to make that happen. If I can embrace a positive, goal-driven mindset, I’ll be the better human being that I always strive to be.

I also recognized that while some things in my life are not 100 percent ideal, I’m still better off than a lot of other people. I have a job. I have a place to live. I have good health. I have clothes on my back. God willing, I’ll continue to have these things. So what if I cheated and ate McDonald’s? There are kids in Ethiopia and Yemen who would kill to have that food on their table. It’s all about perspective.

At the end of the day, what can we do to see the positives in bad situations? The best thing is just finding a way to spin it into a positive. Positive affirmations work well for this. After all, I’ve been in Prague for nearly two years now, and although it hasn’t been easy, I’ve made it work despite the pandemic and restrictions. Whenever I have a bad day or bad weekend, I think about what I went through to get here and that I got out of my comfort zone in the first place.

I think another key is sharing your feelings with others. I’m blessed to have a supportive family who is always willing to listen to my problems and concerns. Yes, they are 5,000 miles and six time zones away, and sometimes they are the only people who I feel truly have my back, but I know that they ALWAYS will. Getting thoughts on paper through journaling is another excellent way to do this. I love to write (duh) and have written journal entries of up to five pages. I’m weird. Tell me something I don’t know. But it is very therapeutic. You should try it.

Clearing your mind is also crucial. Of course, you can do this by talking to trusted allies, but you also can meditate. Admittedly, I had never really meditated until recently, but I can already see the effects it’s had on me and how it changes my day for the better. You can watch motivational videos (I personally recommend TED Talks). The aforementioned nature walks are great because they can take your mind off of your concerns and keep you from constantly checking your phone. Hopefully, I’ll have someone to join me next time, but even if I don’t, it’s all good. Whether you have company or not, the walks still serve a purpose.

Another thing that helps to clear my mind is praying. God has helped me through some times in my life which have been much, much worse than this weekend. Being open and honest with God takes a big weight off of my shoulders. I know that He is there for me and knows my thoughts. He has a plan for me and wants me to come out of this experience stronger.

Ultimately, life just boils down to being the best version of yourself day in and day out. There have been days when I have been the best version of myself, and, of course, there have been days when I haven’t. But if you have a clear and open mind, a positive attitude, and the proper mindset, you’re more than halfway there. Don’t let one slip up or one tough weekend let you lose sight of your goals.

Because if you lose sight of your goals, then you’re just the Buffalo Sabres, and let’s be honest, no one wants to be them.